24 Going on 60- Damsel bearing Tantrums

I am pretty sure a lot of young (old as per the Indian consensus)  and unmarried women can relate to this post. Now we have a lot of women/girls who are hitting their 25 age limit and are unmarried and who have no plans of marrying anywhere in the near future. But is this accepted by the innumerable aunties, uncles, granny's, granddads, neighbors, roadside romeos (dunno who gave them the title), maids, moms, dads, sisters, brother-in-law/sister-in-law families..

Now one thing that every Indian girl (for that matter any Indian) has written an agreement to before being born is that "Under every other circumstance/ Under every single minute for the rest of my life, I will for sure let every random person my Uncle/Aunty and every single random citizen to place their opinions on me, and will be subject myself to constant scrutiny and interrogation on the most ineffectual topics such as my marriage (most importantly)."

As Indians we need to let people place their opinions on us, answer their questions on our education and job.. now that the those are settled we move to subjecting ourselves to answer questions on marriage (Oh we love to poke others lives)  ... Now if you are a true Indian you wouldn't find it any less than normal.. I really cannot talk about guys in the issue of marriage coz for starters I am a girl and two guys on a large scale have a lotta psychological issues pertaining to commitment to anything (Just kidding )

But as girls there are certain things that we hear a lot in our day to day lives, or sometimes things that people say to our parents..  and some of those are as follows;

1)  Girls.. these days... Does she have a Boyfriend? (The nosy and noisy Aunty)

Umm.. yeah Aunty! the thing is .... I have a boyfriend he is basically half of Arnold Vasloo (in his Mummy form) and Half Scorpion king  (The scorpion part) and raised by the Animal Phyla (That's the cute side.. like jungle book )..He is brave, strong.. except there is one little glitch.. He isn't from our community...

               

 

 2) Oi.. What does she have to work for... She a girl, her job is handling the kitchen (The very hungry Uncle)

Right!!! The thing is, i personally love cooking.. but i don't know why everybody blames me for the death of the 3 cats, hospitalization of the groom who came to see me.. All i did was serve him coffee... On a totally different context.. would you like to have some Halwa i made?

Oh yeah Also, there is something called as Independence..Please feed on the dictionary once in your lifetime to improve your vocabulary.

 

 3) Something is definitely wrong with her horoscope (the ever worrying granny)

Yeah! I have been suffering from acute case of Horoscopical Maritomisis... so please treat me with your potion of ambrosia brought from the land of Maritasma... 

 

 4) This is all because of her Education!!! (Grandad of all times)

Yeah.. I am sorry that my education gave me this really independent life where i work and stand on my own feet...Im sorry that I am not following the rules of our society laid millions of years ago and acting like an evolved creature....Now get me a husband who can hunt deer and for dinner we shall feed on its flesh and drink its blood... You can join too.. I am sure we will find space in our stomachs to be cannibals...

 

 5) She will never get Married after 25!! (Moms sister) 

I know... Whats my life without  marriage.. I mean am i even worth being in this world anymore... Please if that happens... I give you the freedom to kill yourself... (Just kidding)

6)  I heard these days people like to play the same leg... I she into that? (The pesty neighbor who got some worldly information from her brother who lives in US)

Right!! So where exactly am I supposed to go to find the lost screws coz i really cant see the brain cells roaming everywhere.... 

7)  Oi... Hoi.... I always knew she loved me... She is too scared to admit it (The roadside romeo to his friends)

Yes.. apparently i am the damsel in distress writhing in agony caused by the societal obligations to be with the right person and not you who has no job, no sense, and absolutely no brain in the large head that is carried by a very small body.... 

 

  8) My daughter got married when she was 17... (The very pompous friend of the whole society)

Wait what? call the freaking cops.... 

9) How old is she? 24... OMG ( The very surprised random married friend of my brother)

Yes i am 24.. For freaking gods sake im not 60... Btw who are you?

 10) Im telling you.. wait any longer and she wont have any children: (Crazy older cousin) 

umm yeah... If the question of me bearing should arise... lemme assure you that there are quiet a lotta children out there in the world who need families... And NO!!! You cannot determine their caste or community by getting a blood test done... Thank you!!!!

So Girls If you really have dreams that you wanna chase, just be confident enough not to care about what people say... Most importantly be independent both emotionally and financially... Love you all...